Biography Class 9 June - 14 July 2022

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I've just finished the last session on the Biography Writing class I've been taking with City Lit as part of my Developing Your Creative Practice project and it's all been fantastic experience. The writing exercises set by instructor Robert Fraser have led to me having an outline, trajectory and core themes in mind for my book, which I feel I can begin to draft now.

As a special treat, Robert invited the author of our focus text, Xanthi Barker, to join us, and she managed 15 minutes from her lunch break. We got through quite a lot actually, and she was generous with her answers to our questions. It was particularly useful to hear about her writing process for the book in question: Will This House Last Forever?* about her relationship with her father, the late poet Sebastian Barker. As a school teacher she mainly wrote in the summer. She wrote in the mornings, then gave herself the rest of the day to swim or be in the sun when possible. It was too much to be in all day. She also mentioned writing about what she most felt like writing about on any given day rather than following a strict order, which is my strategy for the most part, too. I won't focus properly if something else is on my mind, much like a too-familiar meme. She spoke of being confronted with strong reactions that she felt misunderstood her book and having to be sure in herself about her own views of it. It was great to meet her in a small, gushing, brief and virtual way. I was very moved by her story and impressed with her way of writing. Even Robert began changing up his approach, saying Xanthi's style is freeing.

I'm happy and still not quite believing that I've received praising feedback and highly useful suggestions and questions about my assignments and project. I worry that I haven't contributed much to discussing others' work. I struggle to cut through sometimes in the size of group we had and time is ever ticking. Yes, I've been surprised by how well received my scribblings have been. In the last session, though, my classmates said they were only then really getting my project and I realised that, even though I thought I'd thrown a lot / too much at them, in my anxiety to not take up too much time, I wasn't as detailed in offering context as I could have been - and had permission to be. Robert drilled down on my backstory, which I'd been vague about because I don't want to have to justify or defend myself. It's still my default setting that I won't be believed about the workplace bullying that led to me losing the career I'd worked my guts out for. But they were perfectly accepting and merely curious. I thought I was an open book but it turns out I was being guarded. It's all been very useful in knowing what to include, and in what ways to include it. At the moment I feel hopeful about producing something and more confident that I can produce something people might want to read. I won't think about the super scary parts around getting it published until I've made a workable draft.

I'm free of courses and homework for a little while, so I'll aim to write in the mornings and read in the afternoons on my funded days and when I don't have other work on (did I mention I make a podcast?). That was a piece of advice Xanthi offered - and something I've already thrown myself into - is reading widely. Rather than feeling intimidated by other writers I'm starting to feel like part of a community, that I'm allowed and welcome to be there, that my place is there, and the displacement I was feeling before, however privileged, was to do with a state of mind, being and doing, and not my physical location. I might be on a journey home without having to go anywhere at all.

I'm so grateful to Robert and all my classmates for such a great experience on this course, and to Arts Council England paying for me to take it!


 

*affiliate link - orders via this link might earn me a small commission, plus you'll be helping out local book shops!

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