Crossroads
With a blinding headache, tight chest, and heavy, confused heart, I figured a constructive way to tackle stagnation and mild despair would be to thrash it out in writing. This also confronts head-on my anxiety over not getting any real writing done since the summer, and hopefully this will kick-start my engines again. The underpinning purpose of this diaristic post, I think, is to try to work through issues I currently face in my academic career and to see if I can resolve to either stick it out or to jump ship. Is it time for a new, more fulfilling challenge? If so, what? I am deeply unhappy in my current job. The most disappointing part of this is that after five years of uncertainty, debt, precarious fixed-term contracts, being shunted around the UK (now in my fifth city in five years), and facing separation from everyone I love and have come to befriend every year, I finally have a well-paid, permanent job, whatever permanent means. In that job I feel demeaned, demoralized, uns