The Writing Hour 22 March 2022

Prompt word: sunshine

Are there any memories which this word ignites?

 

On an appropriately sunny afternoon in Newcastle upon Tyne, I have joined my first ever New Writing North writing hour. It’s a shut-up-and-write session that offers prompts to get the creative juices flowing. It is perhaps a little strange to do this over Zoom, but it feels less lonely and we’re more accountable to ourselves if we remove all distractions and feel the connection to other writers, even if we’re not seeing or listening to each other. I wish I had discovered it before, but there we go. I miss the shut-up-and-writes with the Deeners. 

 

But I digress, for I am supposed to be writing about memories to do with sunshine. This is a struggle at the moment as I’m in the premenstrual phase of my cycle and I’m battling with insomnia, so my brain’s not interested in recall right now, but just muddling through the day! Andrew and I had a great cycle in the sun on Sunday, which it just occurs to me was the equinox. I have really felt the change in the past wee while. I have been tentative about declaring it Spring, given the snap winter we had last April, and the dragging winter the dreaded year before. But it seems this year we are having a more graduated release from winter’s cold grip and may well experience heat waves in the coming month. 

 

I have felt surprisingly energetic recently. Even with the lack of sleep, I feel lighter, in more control, and enjoying things more than I have for a long time. There are many factors to this. Back in January I blitzed a load of recordings for audiovisual cultures scheduled up to the end of April. While fun, it was exhausting. Being able to take a break from that for a while has meant that I’ve had more time to devote to get back into writing, including job applications. The rejections for these have actually been a positive experience as they’ve helped me rule things out. I really don’t see myself re-entering academia, and especially not in light of the issues raised by UCU strike actions, which this time are the most extensive I’ve ever known. If I’m going to be exploited, I’d rather it be for something I enjoy! I also had a go at positions in cultural organisations with no dice, although given the correspondence for one, I suspect I was longlisted and the idea of that felt good. 

 

What was really enjoyable and lit me right up was being commissioned by my dear friend Johanna Leech (and technically Northern Ireland Screen), to write something for her exhibition Bending Glass - the last to be held at Havelock House. I suggested a guide text as I’d got so much out of the way the Treasures from the Wreck of the Unbelievable guide was presented. It has been such a fun project and we’re still not done. 

 

Prompt 2: Rise

Optional sentence: The earth said…

 

Well, I think this next prompt taken figuratively gives me licence to carry on my story. What arose in me from working on this guide was renewed confidence, joy in my work, intellectual curiosity, regained focus, and a determination to forge my path. As soon as I was done with a job application I’d put heart and soul into, but knew I didn’t have the experience for, I wondered if I could make a viable application for Arts Council England’s Developing Your Creative Practice fund. Before speaking to Johanna, I had been mithering about what to work on next. Which of the many abandoned projects should I restart? Which of them could even work out? I was panicking about earning a living; it had just been so long since I had an income over £30 in a month. I hadn’t sold anything in ages and I hadn’t had any new patrons (both of which have since happened), and I just didn’t know what to take a chance on next. The ACE application helped me narrow that down. 

 

In draft one, I figured out what practice it was I wanted to develop: a personal creative-critical writing practice, specifically centred on art writing. I sought out what training and research would be most beneficial and what of that I could access in the appropriate time frame. In draft two, I ramped up how I was presenting my work, plans and budget. I attended an incredibly helpful and collaborative online session hosted by Leila who administrates the North East Cultural Freelancers Facebook group. I was worried I would have nothing to offer, but I had read the guidance thoroughly and watched videos and found redacted winning applications kindly published online, so I did have a few things to offer as well as to ask. It felt good to be part of a community, and I hope we can all benefit at some point. 

 

What this session really showed me was how grossly I was underselling my labour. I was going to give myself a day-rate of £50, rounding up what full-time on a living wage would give. But this did not take into consideration my skills, knowledge, expertise and how much specialised research and writing the development would take. I mean, I’m hardly starting from scratch, and I needed to recognise this and demand my worth. So draft three was pretty radical. I whittled it down to the bare bones of what I needed while making sure I paid myself and others well - not just fairly, but well - for our time and expertise. I then met with my nominated person to provide a document in support of my application who suggested some tweaks in my statements if I could squeeze them into the restrictive character counts, which I gratefully just about managed to do. Hey, it’s all a creative writing challenge, which I rose to - boom boom!!

 

***end of session***

sunshine in Portmeirion, Wales, April 2018

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