Creative Writing Task

On 6 May 2021 I attended a free online creative writing taster workshop offered by Newcastle College. I had a really nice afternoon with an interesting bunch of people. We talked about writing in the present tense to pull in the reader, finding ways of giving information without explicitly telling it. A task we built up to was writing around memories of a single piece of clothing as a vehicle for defining relationships and characterization. The others edited as they went, whereas I spill out everything in my head, my hands usually struggling to keep up with my brain. I like having a lump of clay to work with in the edit. Here is what I wrote that day:

I once had this gorgeous black jumper-dress. It is such a big regret that I ever gave it away. I wore it all the time. I'd still wear it now. What was I thinking? I ordered a size 12 but they sent a 24. But it was class. I could dress it up or down. I could be slouchy and comfortable or I could put on a broad, brightly coloured belt and tights and boots and head out for the night. I flipping loved it. It was cute with baggy jeans. When I remember myself wearing it, the memory is always at Queen's. Second and third year PhD. Researching and writing the thesis. Comfort that could be transformed with little effort to something vaguely chic to head out. 25-26 years old. Confident, mostly happy. Had lost a lot of weight and was enjoying no longer being a fat person who was also now a gym bunny. I remember wearing it to that live immersive AI-enhanced theatre production based on the Ciaran Carson novel. I have forgotten the titles, but I remember being there in the QFT/Brian Friel Theatre with Twy. She took that great profile photo of me while I was putting my glasses back on after wiping them. I had my hair tied back and had a fringe and was wearing that yellow, patterned headband I loved on. I wore it so much it fell apart. Was it flowers on it? Or a Paisley design? No, that doesn't sound right. It was cute anyway. I also wore that long white vest top I still have under the jumper-dress. And I think baggy jeans which I still have but haven't worn in a couple of years. I was probably wearing my blue cons too, but who knows? I had dark lipstick on.

I also remember wearing it at those two desks. The second-year one in House 11 and the third-year one in College Green. It was the red or purple belts I'd wear it with. D'you remember those electric-blue tights? I still have the dark green ones and the checked ones and - no, those dark purple ones were later, the textured knitted ones. I liked that, wearing the black jumper-dress or the black shirt-dress Twy gave me. Boy, I loved that too. Practically lived in those. Why did I give them up? Have never found anything like them again. Oh, and there was the big checked shirt-dress that time in London, Camden Market, when I went for a conference and Susan came with me. We had a cool day in the market. If I'd have had more space in my bag (and more money) I'd have bought that shirt and probably still been wearing it too.

The wounds of returning, eh? A good time and a painful time. How different life is now. Those three years were the most stable and also the hardest. Given what happened later, I don't know if it was worth it. But I achieved something, and the jumper-dress gave me comfort and made me feel good back then. So it's not just that I liked it, it's that it mattered beyond simply being something to wear. And I haven't found one since.